Helping Your Children Adjust to School
Now that the New Year has fallen upon us, so has the new school year. For many parents, the idea of sending their child to school for the first time can be pretty daunting. For their child, on the other hand, it can absolutely terrifying. As I’m sure most Mum’s and Dad’s would expect, anxiety is quite common for children when they first start school. Every child is different and will undoubtedly adapt to change in their own way, though it’s also important to know that it’s completely normal for children to feel nervous or upset when making the transition to school. If this is the case for your child (or if you just want to be extra prepared), try to keep a few of these helpful tips in mind.
DEVELOP A ROUTINE
Transitioning your child to school begins at home. If you spring your child’s first day of school on them with no preparation whatsoever, it’s unlikely that you’ll have a happy ending of any sort… Or a happy child, for that matter. A week before the school term starts, encourage your child to head to bed a little earlier to establish a bedtime routine that is similar to the one they’ll follow during their school weeks. This will not only minimise the meltdowns that might occur when you ask them to get into bed earlier than usual, but it will also help them to understand that they need a good night’s sleep in order to feel rested and focused for school. Try to make the bedtime routine as calm as possible and provide a little extra reassurance where needed. When the first morning of school rolls around, have a set routine for getting dressed and preparing for the day. This will not only help your child learn what to expect, but it will also help them to feel in control.
EASE YOUR CHILD’S MIND
Abandonment is a common fear for many children when they first start school. Some might worry that they’ll be dropped off at the front gates and never picked up again, while some might worry that they’ll lose Mum and Dad’s attention now that they’re a “big kid”. Work towards easing your child’s mind by trying to show up early (or at least on time) to pick them up from school. If your child catches the bus, try to ensure that you or another trusted adult is there to greet them when they get home. When you get home from work, ask your child about their day and show genuine interest and curiosity. This repeated reassurance will help your child to feel more comfortable to go to school each day, knowing that someone will be there for them when they’ve finished.
GIVE YOUR CHILD A SENTIMENTAL REMINDER
The biggest reason that most children struggle to go to school is that they miss their parents and don’t want to say goodbye to them. Chances are, they’ve been pretty attached to you for the past 4-5 years since they were born, so parting with you for just one day can be extremely nerve-wracking. Here is your chance to get creative and gift your child with something they can hold onto that will remind them of you if they feel sad or worried. It can be something as simple as a paper heart, a scribble or a picture of the family – Whatever it might be that helps them to feel safe. This will help your child to feel close to you even when you’re apart, and allow them to feel a sense of comfort after saying goodbye. You might also like to develop a “leaving” ritual such as a hug, high five or special handshake. Remember, it’s the little things that matter most to children!
ENCOURAGE FRIENDSHIPS
One of the best parts of starting pre-school, prep or kindy is the opportunity to make friends and play with other kids. Encourage your child to get to know the other students in their class and be social during lunch breaks. Continue to encourage their new friendships by allowing playdates – You might make a new friend of your own in the process, too! As your child finds their feet with a few familiar faces, they’ll feel far more comfortable going to school each day and knowing that there is something to talk to and play with.
REWARD INDEPENDENCE
It goes without saying that starting school and transitioning into primary education is a HUGE step for children when it comes to developing independence. This is a massive adjustment for them, so be sure to reward your child with praise for being brave and stepping out of their comfort zone, trying new things and making new friends. This will not only encourage them to keep at it, but will also boost their self-esteem as they learn that becoming self-sufficient is a positive trait to build upon.
At the end of the day, starting school represents a significant change in a child’s life. Just as we feel with our own significant changes with adults, children may feel a rollercoaster of emotions when facing school for the first time. However, if you make small efforts to help them adjust, school will quickly become the norm for your child. They will learn that school is safe and comfortable, and that it is perfectly okay to be away from you at times. Be patient and be kind, but most importantly remember to listen to your child and reassure any and all concerns to the best of your ability.
